Sono Andato
by Zenya
Summary: *Slash & Suicide* Draco's life has always been a test- even when it came to tormenting his arch enemy. Can Draco pass the ultimit test, or will he fail and fade. *Song fic to The Goo Goo Doll's "Iris"


Draco Malfoy sat at the edge of the quidditch field, wrapped in his invisibility cloak, staring at a lone flyer high above him. Draco wanted so desperately to take off the cloak and reveal himself to the flyer, but he knew that would never happen. The flyer was his sworn enemy, Harry Potter.   
  
  
And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now  
  
  
Harry and Draco been enemies, and in Draco's mind, lover's, ever since they were eleven years old. Since the first time Draco's steely, emotionless eyes had met Harry's soulful emerald, he had felt a connection, like no other. Ever insult he had hurled at Harry since their initial contact had been a test. A test for Draco to see if he could keep up the pretense of hating his family's sworn enemy, and still love him at the same time. And of course, every test Draco administered, he passed. He couldn't let go of Harry.   
  
  
And all I can taste is this moment  
and all I can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight  
  
  
In their fourth year at Hogwarts, something in Draco snapped. He had been playing his role of the perfect Slytherin. Devious and cunning as always, Draco had organized a campaign to undermine Harry's role in the Triwizard tournament. He and a few of his friends worked late into the night on badges that displayed the words "Potter stinks" when flashed correctly.   
The next test had been put into to action- but, for the first time, Draco failed it. It happened the first time he flashed the badge, and the tinge of hurt and anger appeared deep in Harry's eyes. Looking into Harry's eyes made Draco want to die, and he couldn't keep up the pretense of hate anymore.   
  
That afternoon, during a break, Draco snuck down to his dorm and pulled the curtains around his bed. Once he was sure the curtains were completely closed, he took out the penknife he had stolen from Harry a few days ago. "I'm so sorry Harry." He whispered, and then methodically pulled the blade across his arm, executing the punishment for failing his test.   
  
  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
  
For the next several days, Draco tormented Harry even more than usual, telling himself he wanted to break Harry, like Harry had broken him- but deep down, he knew he was only succeeding in hurting himself.  
  
  
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
or the moment of truth in your lies  
when everything feels like the movies  
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive  
  
  
Finally, it had come to this. Harry and Draco on the quidditch field together, but separate. Always separate. Draco was writing to Harry again. It had become a habit of Draco's to write unsent letters to Harry. This one however, was going to be sent.  
  
  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
  
  
  
Invisible to the world, Draco took out his shiny metal knife, or friend as he had taken to calling it. He stared at his reflection in the silver for a minute. His eyes were big and silver gray- but for the first time, tired and open, almost pain filled. Draco closed his eyes and took the knife out of his line of sight. He couldn't look at his eyes again. They showed what had happened. They showed that Draco had failed his test. They showed Draco.   
  
  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
  
Draco toyed with the knife for a moment. He knew it was almost time. The moment he had been leading up to all his life was almost there. Finally, Draco grasped the knife firmly and plunged.  
  
  
I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
  
Harry strode toward the castle with a bounce in his step. He had just been flying- something he hadn't been doing enough of lately, especially with all the stress he had undergone in the last few weeks.  
  
Suddenly, Harry stumbled and fell over a rock. Harry bent down to look for the rock he had tripped over, only to find that nothing was there. Puzzled, he began feeling around the ground, looking for what he might have tripped on.  
  
A moment later, Harry felt a strange lump. Even more puzzled, Harry continued to prod the object. With a jolt, he realized that the lump felt like a human being. Then, acting on a hunch, Harry reached up to where he thought the head should be, and pulled off an invisibility cloak.   
Shock flooded through Harry as he fell to his knees. Lying at his feet was the body of Draco Malfoy, with the words "Potter Stinks" carved deep into his chest.  
  
  
I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am 


End file.
